


Tell Me, Willy

by trynfindme



Category: Charlie and the Chocolate Factory (2005), Hannibal (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Porn, Angst and Feels, Angst and Porn, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory - Freeform, Eventual Smut, Food Porn, Gratuitous Smut, Hannibal - Freeform, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, M/M, Porn With Plot, Porn with Feelings, Shameless Smut, Smut, im pretty sure the one who really needs therapy is me though, its food porn but in a pun sort of way, johnny depp version of willy wonka, oompa loompa social dynamics, raw cannibalism, someone gets turned into human taffy, willy wonka seeks hannibal lecter's counseling, wonka has daddy issues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-08
Updated: 2021-02-08
Packaged: 2021-03-14 13:55:37
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,605
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29296980
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/trynfindme/pseuds/trynfindme
Summary: In which Hannibal Lecter takes a specific interest in his new patient, William Wonka.
Relationships: Hannibal Lecter/Willy Wonka
Comments: 9
Kudos: 6





	Tell Me, Willy

**Author's Note:**

> skip to roughly halfway through if you're only here for the smut and gore (just know i will fucking judge you for it even though i'm not in the position to judge anyone for anything)  
> just so we're explicitly clear this is the johnny depp iteration of willy wonka NOT the original gene wilder portrayal

“Please, come in.”

With a flourish of a rich red velvet cloak, Hannibal Lecter’s new patient entered his office. The man was a sight to behold-- dark hair cut just at the jawline, deeply defined cheekbones, ridiculous top hat sitting snugly atop his head. It was all very… gaudy. Tasteless. Hannibal usually had no patience for tasteless extravagance like this, but the conditions under which he was conducting the appointment were most intriguing. Hannibal’s interest had been piqued, and his attention was transfixed on this new case.

The man gave a sharp giggle before switching his walking stick to his left hand, then his right, then his left again, extending his right hand out for a handshake. Hannibal took the purple, iridescent gloved hand in his own, giving it a firm shake. The man giggled again.

“Take a seat,” Hannibal said with a light smirk. _Most_ intriguing, this man was. “I read your file. Would you like to discuss the circumstances under which you have been prescribed my counseling and just skip the pleasantries, if that’s alright, Mr. Wonka?”

“Oh. Oh it is _quite_ alright. Well!” The eccentric man adjusted himself in his seat, sitting eerily straight with his legs crossed. Hannibal had, of course, read his file: William Wonka, sole owner of the Wonka candy empire, a business he had built himself that grew to dominate the world in all of its chocolatey splendor. He was seeing Hannibal as a result of several gruesome deaths in his factory-- all children, the first visitors he’d allowed in decades. Most _intriguing_ . Hannibal would usually consider the killing of children to be as tasteless as everything else regarding the man’s demeanor, but something about this whole persona seemed to… to _work_ , to contrast the world around him like an absurdist kind of poetry. Mr. Wonka continued to speak.

“So _terrible_ what happened. Well,” Wonka giggled, “Terrible _indeed_. My sympathies to the p-- pa-- paaarents. They did sign the wavers.”

“Do you acknowledge the… unorthodox circumstances under which the deaths occured?”

“ _Occurred_ .” Mr. Wonka hummed lightly in thought. “Yes, deaths did occur. Well. It was most interesting. Tragic, yes, but Dr. Lecter, I’m afraid I _simply_ cannot take responsibility for the death of those children, however, ooh, ‘unorthodox’ they may have been.” He gave Hannibal a pointed look that he couldn’t quite place. Something told Hannibal this man could sense he was a fan of the unorthodox.

“Mr. Wonka--”

“Oh dear! Please, call me Willy.”

“Tell me, Willy,” Hannibal began tentatively, “How is it that you reason those children’s untimely deaths were in no way your responsibility?”

“I can assure you with most confidence, Dr. Lecter, that I only… watched decisions being made, and I watched those decisions play out. Those children had lived their lives up until that point, raised a certain way, by their p-- paaar-- pareeents. Their mommies and their daddies. And they made decisions based off of all that, and I simply watched those decisions lead to their natural consequences.”

“You… watched.”

“Yes, I watched. So did their mommies and their daddies. It was most interesting-- though tragic, of course, very tragic.”

“Interesting,” Hannibal mused, utterly taken by the man’s off-kilter lack of sympathy, or lack of awareness. No… the man was aware, very aware of everything happening around him. He just preferred to bear morbid witness. “So you observed how their decisions led to other decisions. But were you observing, or were you participating? I’d prefer if you’d answer honestly.” Wonka let out a single, high pitched giggle.

“I just like to watch.” He smiled tightly.

“Did you know what they would do?”

“I was curious,” Wonka mused. He relaxed in his seat just a smidge, just enough to betray his contentment with the way the events of that day in the factory had panned out.

“You were curious what would happen… curious what the children would do, what the parents would do.” Mr. Wonka’s lips tightened at the mention of the parents. “Did you anticipate their thoughts, counter-thoughts… rationalizations?”

“It is certainly hard to think what someone is thinking before they’ve thunk it. Well! Think, thank, thunk. Thunk is the noise little Veruca Salt made when she fell down the chute into the incinerator. How silly, Dr. Lecter! One can never anticipate the wild imaginations of little children.”

“Indeed… children. You seem very receptive of children, Mr. Wonka, you even opted to leave your fortunes and legacy to a child rather than a more responsible adult.”

“Children make the world go round, Dr. Lecter. Grown people always ruin the fun. Children see a candy wonderland, and they are filled with _excitement_ ! In awe of the _possibilities_! Grown people just see it as a waste, such a shame. It’s their childlike wonder that led them to make those decisions-- that and the failings of their par-- paaar-- paaarrrrents. I’m sure you can agree it’s quite interesting.”

“Quite…” Hannibal sat back, debating the proper way to proceed. Such a promising start, it would hardly be hard to mold the man to his liking, as he did with all of his patients. He could even take it farther, possibly. The man had ideas Hannibal had never considered-- so enraptured by the psychological dynamics between the parent and the child. Enraptured, perhaps, or confined to. Yet the subject was so vast, it could hardly be confining. So much potential. Most… intriguing… 

~~

It was only their second session, but Hannibal was already engulfed by the case of Mr. William Wonka. The man standing across his office was in the exact same ridiculous getup as last time-- it was as if he didn’t ever change his clothes. Hannibal briefly wondered if he slept in them as well, but the image of Willy sleeping amongst rumpled sheets conjured thoughts that he would prefer to keep out of his mind. Their session had already been going for a while, but it was steadily keeping Dr. Lecter’s attention.

“I suppose since you’re a psychiatrist you’ll want to connect this all back to my p-- parrrr- parrrrrents,” Wonka said as he sifted through the sketches Hannibal had piled on his desk. “But mommies and daddies are so silly! They are no fun at all, Dr. Lecter. I wouldn’t want to talk about them on purpose, not when we could talk about licorice twists and big, fat lollipops the size of a child’s head.” The man was intriguing, yes, but something about him grated sharply on Hannibal’s nerves. Something else about Willy grated sharply on Hannibal’s tender member, but that was neither here nor there. He was keeping it professional.

“Perhaps it may help you to talk about them. It can be very liberating.”

“Hehehe!” Wonka giggled, slamming the foot of his cane down on the expensive rug. Hannibal flinched. “My daddy was a dentist.” He giggled again. “My mommy was a whore! But do you know what, Dr. Lecter?” He moved swiftly towards Hannibal’s chair, bending down until their faces were a few scant inches apart. “They watched their decisions play out. The consequences of their decisions were the last things they saw! I know just about everything there is to know about the candy game, Dr. Lecter, and believe it or not-- despite all the sugary corn syrupy goodness there is to be had in a Wonka Chocolate bar-- nothing is as sweet as revenge.”

At this, Wonka stood up abruptly with a bright grin.

“Session’s over, ding dong goes the clock! I’ll see you next week, Dr. Lecter.” With two taps of his cane on the floor he was gone, and Hannibal was left to consider his next move. There were two things he wanted to do with such utter force he could hardly stand it. There was simply the matter of how to go about making the whole ordeal poetic, bringing the story to an apt close.

Hannibal wanted to bed him.

And Hannibal _desperately_ wanted to consume him.

~~

As their third session drew to a close, Hannibal was fairly confident he could ask his question and get the answer he was looking for, and very much looking forward to.

“...they tend to squirm when I experiment on them, but how am I supposed to test the strength of the taffy pullers if I can’t use an Oompa Loompa for reference? Oh, but they like it, they see it as a sort of sacrificial offering--”

“Mr. Wonka-- Willy, begging your pardon, and I apologize if this is too forward of me, but would you like to come back to my place for dinner, and perhaps spend the night?” Wonka gasped.

“Oh _goody_ ! Just like a slumber party! We can watch a movie and stuff our faces with candy until our teeth hurt-- I so _love_ slumber parties.”

“The evening I had in mind was a bit more… intimate.” Willy’s eyes glazed over with understanding and he sat back in his seat musing over the proposal.

“Oh… oh _my_. Silly me.” Willy gave a small smile and giggled behind a gloved hand. He eyed Hannibal bashfully before offering his hand out for Hannibal to take, and Hannibal graciously took it. “Lead the way, Dr. Lecter.”

~~

Hannibal was the perfect gentleman, wining and dining his guest with an air of great politeness as he anticipated the events to come. He fed Willy the heart of an expectant father-- a fitting last meal, though it took some trouble to prepare. Hannibal was not one to be giddy with excitement. He guided Willy to the bedroom with a delicate hand on the small of his back, his fingers swathed in the deep red velvet of Willy’s coat. Willy giggled excitedly.

“Well! Dr. Lecter-- I suppose I’ll call you Hannibal now, shant I? Well! Do you treat all your patients so _special_?”

“Just you,” Hannibal murmured, enraptured by deep brown eyes. “Without fail you catch my eye like the colorful blur of a painted bunting as it darts across the sky. That bird sings a song so sweet-- and you are, of course, connoisseur of all things sweet.” Hannibal drew close to Willy, reaching a hand up to delicately trace the ridge of his defined cheekbone. Willy slid his hands down Hannibal’s lapel and began to remove his trim suit jacket.

Hannibal sped the undressing along with increasing fervor, though not so much as to seem greedy or undignified. Wonka’s giggles rang out as he ran his hands through Hannibal’s thick downy chest hair. All of a sudden, with a great flourish, Willy pushed Hannibal backwards into the bed and straddled him _eagerly_ . He unzipped Hannibal’s fly and pulled out a throbbing, erect member the size of the _biggest_ Wonka icicle pop.

Willy smacked his lips before dipping his head down and all at once taking Hannibal’s thick, majestic length into his mouth all at once as if he was sucking on a Wonka lollipop. Wonka had quite the technique-- presumably due to his candy expertise-- and Hannibal silently congratulated himself on his choice of sexual partner as he wildly grasped at the bedsheets and stifled a moan. Did this man have no gag reflex?

Willy drew back up the length, releasing it with an audible pop. He smiled tightly, exposing all of his tiny teeth.

“Your cock tastes _just_ like a Wonka Chocolate Bar,” he stated with a bubbly excitement before pulling down the foreskin and wrapping his lips around the pink, slippery head, already dripping with mingled saliva and precum.

Hannibal felt the pleasure ripple up and down his body as Wonka deepthroated his ridiculously large and hungry cock. He moaned despite himself, already feeling the sheen of sweat prickle his skin. All of a sudden Willy pulled back and sat up, unzipping his own fly and removing his wonkish trousers. His own organ stood at attention, rosy pink and excited.

“Hannibal, I’d like you to meet _Little_ Willy.” Little Willy was indeed very little. Why, Little Willy couldn’t have been bigger than a Wonka Everlasting Gobstopper. Despite this, Hannibal couldn’t imagine a more beautiful dick, even if it were sculpted by Michelangelo himself.

“In Ancient Greece it was considered noble to have as small a dick as possible,” Hannibal murmured with a small smile.

“Well! That is _exactly_ how we see things in the Wonka Chocolate Factory. In fact, the Oompa Loompa caste system is strictly based on cock size. Leadership positions are only granted to the Oompa Loompas with the smallest, cutest little dicks-- the ones most similar in shape and size to my own.” Willy smirked as he finished removing Hannibal’s trousers, running his fingers through the thick, downy hair on his legs. Wonka’s legs were entirely smooth-- not because he shaved them, or waxed them, or anything like that-- just because hair just didn’t grow there. In fact, his entire body save for his head and eyebrows was smooth as the bonnet on a porsche.

Willy reached a hand behind himself and fiddled around for a moment before producing a bright pink and yellow candy striped butt plug, gooey with lube and warm from the hot cavern of his asshole. He smiled without his eyes as he tossed it onto the bed beside Hannibal.

“I keep it in at all times for personal reasons.” Without the need for any preparation, Wonka quickly and easily eased his way onto Hannibal’s thick, hot, sticky daddy cock, still tacky from the wetness of Willy’s mouth. Hannibal growled with pleasure and flipped them over, lying Wonka flat on his back as he pushed into him with heated wanton need. Willy giggled sharply as Hannibal’s impossibly long daddy dick brushed against his prostate, or as he liked to call it, the center of his Wonka Tootsie Pop.

Hannibal pounded into Willy, grunting and exhaling sharply with pleasure as he railed the candy man relentlessly. They came together with a gasp-- and a giggle from Willy-- before Hannibal collapsed beside his lover on the silken sheets of his extravagant bed.

“Well! It looks like you’ve turned me into a Wonka Cadbury Egg, Dr. Lecter!” Willy folded his hands neatly on his chest as he grinned toothily at the sweaty, gasping man beside him. Hannibal let out an exhausted chuckle.

“You’ll stay the night, won’t you, Willy?”

“I suppose I haven’t got anywhere else to be.” At that, Willy Wonka closed his eyes and immediately fell asleep. Hannibal gazed at the ceiling thoughtfully, going over his plans for the rest of the night in his head as he mentally prepared himself for what was going to happen next.

~~

Hannibal stood poised over Wonka’s sleeping form, hammer poised and ready to strike. He would shatter Willy’s spine at the base of his neck, paralyzing him and effectively making him unable to fight back. He would then carry Willy’s limp body down to the basement where he would strap the man’s body to opposite ends of a taffy puller as if it were a medieval stretching machine. Wonka would feel every bone in his body shatter until he had been folded in on himself in such a way that his body, already ripe with internal bleeding, would be torn apart. Hannibal would mix his remains into a batch of saltwater taffy.

Just as he began the calculated maneuver of bringing the hammer down upon his target, about a dozen little hands grabbed his arms and legs, disarming him and lifting him off the ground. He looked around him, seeing only a blur of orange and green as he was carried from the room. He felt a sharp pain on his noggin and everything went dark.

~~

When Hannibal came to, he was surrounded by a whirlwind of bright and wonderful colors! Goody, look at all the rainbow colors! A forest of striped lollipop trees, a river of gooey warm chocolate! Even the grass looked _delicious_ \-- what was going on? Where were all of his clothes?

“Well! Look who’s awake.” A voice to his right drew his attention away from the sickly sweet splendor surrounding him on all sides. Willy Wonka… Willy… Willy smiled wide, the smile disappearing under his unfathomably round and ridiculous sunglasses. His teeth were surprisingly white and shiny considering all the candy he put in his yummy tummy. Yummy Wonka Gobstoppers, yummy Wonka Flavor Changing Gum, yummy Wonka Marshmallow Fluff Chocolate Bars. Why, Hannibal must have won a golden ticket! A special golden ticket for a ride right into hell.

A chorus of Oompa Loompas rose up around him as the small beings paraded across the sprawling candy landscape.

“Hannibal Lecter! Hannibal Lecter! Somebody call the meat inspector! Thought he could munch on our dear Master Wonka, now we’re making taffy with his badonkadonka!” They sang, skipping with glee and spinning in all directions.

“What is… Willy… what’s going..g… on…”

“Don’t be _silly_ , Dr. Lecter. I have _much_ more agency in this town than you could ever imagine. You think I wasn’t aware of your diet? Well! Cannibalism is usually frowned upon by society,” Wonka said softly and cheerily and sharply, the unnerving smile never leaving his face. “If you wanted something sweet to eat I could have just treated you to a Wonka Chocolate Bar. Alright. Well! You would rather gobble me up instead, and that simply will not do.” At this, Willy delicately pressed down on a lever, pulling it back up immediately after doing so. The taffy puller let out a metallic squeak and Hannibal was pushed and pulled in four different directions, painfully stretching every inch of his body more than he ever thought he could be stretched.

“You know who _you_ remind me of, is little Mike Teavee. We had to stretch him this way and that to try and get him to be the size of a normal little boy again! It didn’t work, I’m afraid. It was like pulling the arms and legs off of a barbie doll. Well! The Oompa Loompas found his bits and pieces to be quite tasty, once we dipped them in the Wonka Chocolate River and covered them with rainbow sprinkles. Isn’t that wonderful, Dr. Lecter?” Hannibal desperately searched his surroundings for a way out, but oh dear! It seems like he was stuck here. And was it really such a bad place to be stuck in? Look at the candyfloss clouds. Hannibal’s teeth hurt just looking at all this candy. Yummy, _yummy_ candy! Hard candies and soft candies, candies with little surprises inside, mm yummy little candy bits melt in your mouth little morsels that tickle your teeth and slide down your esophagus and give you diabetes. Mmmm, candy, candy with nuts and crunchy candy and candy with smooth melty insides that make your mouth feel all fuzzy mmm juicy little candies that pop and gush down your chin mmm messy candies that just get all over the place so many candies and all ready to go in his tummy! Only he couldn’t eat them because he was being murdered oh _dear_.

Wonka pressed down on the lever for another moment and Hannibal felt a flash of white hot pain as his spine and both of his knees simultaneously shattered. He cried out in pain and his mouth filled with the taste of the sweet smell of candy.

Wonka pressed the lever again, forcing Hannibal’s lower back and thighs into a forward facing horizontal position while his shoulders, face and toes were turned towards the sky blue ceiling. A little known fact about the Wonka Factory Candyland is that the sky, like everything else there, is entirely edible and it is made out of the sugary dust that goes into Wonka Pixie Stix. Down again went the lever-- which was also edible, and made out of chocolate straws-- and the back of Hannibal’s head pressed firmly into Hannibal’s ass as his feet dug into his groin area. He looked like a human figure eight, how curious!

“Oh, Dr. Lecter, you know how I love to watch! And I love this show so very much, almost as much as Thomas the Tank Engine. Isn’t this so wonderful, my Oompa Loompa friends? Let’s rejoice on this momentous occasion!” Willy pressed the lever all the way down and left it there, skipping off to join the parade of Oompa Loompas that circled the broken fleshy mass in the taffy puller. He lifted his cane up with glee as the throngs of green haired viewers were showered with blood. Hannibal’s silly little body was being stretched so far that it had ripped open, gushing blood onto a puddle on the floor that the Oompa Loompas greedily flocked towards and began to lap up happily. Bits of sinewy muscle fell from the glob, but they were gobbled up as soon as they hit the ground. Willy Wonka beamed as the sinew and shattered bones of Hannibal Lecter slid up and down on the taffy puller.

Willy yanked the lifeless European head off of what once was Hannibal Lecter’s body and giddily licked the blood off his lips, drawing the still warm mouth open and taking the tongue between his teeth. It was a heady taste, the blood, but it was a nice contrast to Wonka’s sugary, syrupy existence. Willy bit the tongue off with a snap of his teeth and chewed contentedly. He would have the rest of the head frozen until he could find the time to connect it to the body of an Oompa Loompa. The head was whisked away and Wonka rubbed his hands together in excitement for the experiments to come. What a lovely day in Willy Wonka’s land of pure imagination.

**Author's Note:**

> if anyone wants to start a gofundme so i can go to therapy be my guest  
> side note but i'm pretty sure since there are no female oompa loompas they reproduce via some sort of canon omegaverse


End file.
